It seems like everyone fell in love this winter. All my friends were deep under snuggies with wine and good men while I enjoyed my self-imposed hibernation from dating.
But it’s spring time now and nothing says spring like flirting! A spring fling is essential to warm weather like bright colors and strappy sandals. If you’ve been off the dating scene for a season or two, you may be wondering how to put yourself back out there to meet a quality partner. Where are the good ones hiding? How do you even get started?
When I decided that I’m going to “date” again, I first had to take some time to reflect. What was I really looking for this time around? Did I want to start a long term relationship or just enjoy few meals with good company? Understanding what I was looking for would help me avoid accepting whatever came along because it looked good at the time. If I wanted a long term boo, there was no sense in entertaining the “I don’t want a relationship” man because we are on different pages headed to different libraries.
Knowing what I want is only half the battle. Since I’ve taken a break from dating, I almost forgot where to meet someone! Spring is a great time to start dating again because everyone is out enjoying the warm weather. I must position myself in a place for love to run into me – not come find me under a rock.
So how do you have a successful spring fling?
- Figure out what you really want this season. Quick and simple? Fun and long term? Decide that first before you ever venture out on the scene.
- Get. Out. The. House. Join a new club, find some online community meet and greets, go to a festival. ANYTHING that gets you out with people.
- Be brave. Don’t be afraid to ask someone out, the worst they can say is no. And a few “no’s” aren’t going to kill you.
- Don’t be THAT woman. Nothing is more unattractive than desperation. A desperate woman is THAT woman you hate to see coming. Give off the vibe that you are dating but it’s not your sole focus. Even if it is, fake it till you make it.
- Be smart. If you are out having a fun and flirty spring – use condoms. Nothing will mess up your summer more than an unplanned pregnancy or an STD.
- Revive your look. Your complexion changes with the season. Pick up some new foundation and some new clothes. Revamping your look can give you a confidence boost and make others look at you in a new light.
- Don’t stay in mess too long. If the spring fling gets messy and drama filled, move on! Spring is short and you should enjoy every moment.
- Truly Date. Often we find ourselves not really dating. We find one person, like them, then settle on that one person immediately. Learn to truly date. That means you go on real dates (outside the house and you don’t take your clothes off each time) and with MULTIPLE people. Be careful if you are going to have multiple sex partners (see #5). Go on a variety of dates with different love interests and see where it goes before settling down.
- Keep your eyes open. Don’t overlook the people you already know. A spring fling doesn’t have to be someone brand new, it can be someone from the past that you now see in a different light.
- HAVE FUN! If you aren’t having fun you are doing this all wrong. The point of a spring fling is to explore new sides of yourself, new people, and most importantly, for entertainment. Love will come eventually – you may as well have fun in the meantime.
Spring is about renewal. This spring breathe new life into your old dating habits and head back out on the scene. You never know if love will blossom too this time around.
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