It never fails. Every time you log on to a social network you have some message, from some potential love interest, who is approaching you in the most horrendous way possible.
Examples include – “Hey Sexy!” “Girl you shol’ looking right in that pic” “I’ll take you out and show you what a real man do.”
The messages are often misspelled and annoying at best.
With our generation, dating has definitely changed. You CAN approach someone romantically on a social network but there is a better way. You may find love in an internet space, but it’s not a guarantee. The internet is an imaginary place but the real world rules still apply. Approach someone as a friend first and then express your desire for something more.
This may sound like stalker central but if you pay enough attention, you’ll start to learn someone’s interest. Do they always tweet or update a status about a certain song? Is there instagram full of fabulous dinner plates? Look for things that also interest you as well then make your move. Send a friendly public message that recalls some of your mutual interest. For example, your love interest updates a Facebook status with song lyrics from your favorite artist. Hit the comment box and share that you also love this music.
If the love interest responds, take it to a private message and talk about that artist. Keep the conversation going by asking other questions about life, hobbies etc…
Let the conversation flow naturally. Once you feel it’s mutual, try to take it off social networks through text or arranging a date. Do not attempt to move from social network to real life in a matter of hours or days. You are now in creeper central. Give someone time to warm up to you and time for you to know them. Keeping with the earlier example, you could offer to take the person to a concert of that artist.
Be mindful that most people take EXTREME caution with meeting someone from a social network in real life. Ease their apprehension by turning it into a group event. Making it a group event also keeps you safe – you may not be crazy but they might be coo-coo. Protect yourself too.
The key is to not come off as creepy. Above all else, do NOT become annoying. If your first few conversations were ok but not very in depth or flirty, be careful of over contacting that person. Take a step back and see if the love interest ever messages you first or increases interactions. If someone is responding with one word answers, never initiating conversation after your first few interactions, or putting up “so annoyed by my inbox” status updates just let it go.
Dating is so different and official internet dating sites are expensive. The free method involves a lot of personal discretion/screening and a little bravery. It doesn’t hurt to try. If you do it the right non-creepy way, the worst the person can do is let you off easy – which can be awkward. Be that as it may, the benefit of the internet is being able to block, hide, or unfriend any relationships you’ve now made awkward.
If only real life had the same features.